Can You Feel My Heart Beating Away
by Kawaii Youko
Summary: Miaka had everything; Tamahome, her true love, and Yui, the devoted best friend. However, by cruel twists of fate, she is forced to choose between the two people dearest to her. Will true love or lasting friendship prevail? (Romance - Angst; Chapters 1-7)
1. A Lone Heartbeat in the Night

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Author's note: This is my very first Fushigi Yugi fic, so judge kindly! ^_^  
  
"Miaka, give me your hand."  
  
Tamahome and Miaka stood alone. No one else was around, no one else could hear.  
  
Tamahome reached towards Miaka and grasped her hand, which rest at her side. He gently placed it directly above his heart.  
  
"Do you feel that?" he asked. Miaka could; she felt his heart beating rapidly. "That is my heart beating away."  
  
"Tamahome," she whispered. She looked into his sea-green eyes. The symbol on his forehead now glowed red.  
  
He smiled at her, his eyes shining. He came closer to her, tilting his head slightly.  
  
Miaka was swept away. Her instincts told her to kiss him, yet something deep within her kept her from doing so.  
  
"Tamahome," she said quietly, pulling away. "I - can't."  
  
"What's wrong?" he asked, backing away. "Is something troubling you?"  
  
"No, not really."  
  
How can I lie to him? Miaka asked herself. She felt ashamed that here she was, about to kiss Tamahome, when Yui-chan could be suffering. She couldn't do it.  
  
For a long time Miaka said nothing, nothing at all. She remained there, her eyes unfocused. She was lost in her memory.  
  
"The only reason you even came back here was to see Tamahome!" Yui-chan had said.  
  
Could it be true? No, she had returned to find Yui-chan.  
  
"I would have returned even if Tamahome never existed!" The words echoed in her mind. She loved Tamahome, and seeing him brought back so much.  
  
Yui-chan loved him too; that was painfully clear. She knew how Miaka had to have felt then when she saw him. Yet he seemed to be the reason Yui-chan and she were no longer friends; him and this book.  
  
Sometimes I wish I had never found this book, she thought to herself. None of this would have happened. "Miaka?" Tamahome's voice intruded.  
  
Miaka snapped back to reality, leaving behind her subconscious.  
  
"Yes?" she asked.  
  
"Is something wrong?" he asked again.  
  
She couldn't answer, she just couldn't. Tears stung her eyes, blurring Tamahome's outline.  
  
Tamahome held her close. "It will be okay," he told her.  
  
How could he say that? He did not know what was troubling her, much less that every thing would be okay.  
  
Miaka fought off his embrace. "No, it won't be all right! Yui-chan could be in danger! She may need me!"  
  
This was the first time Tamahome had ever seen her act like that.  
  
"Miaka, calm down."  
  
"NO! You are the whole reason Yui-chan hates me! You and this stupid book!"  
  
Chapter note: Wow, that was a powerful chapter. Miaka is always stereotyped as calm and predictable, but she isn't. She can be as equally volatile as the next person. Read on to find out if this will be the end of Tamahome and Miaka.  
  
Kawaii Youko ^_^ 


	2. Gift or Curse: The Book of the Four Gods

Gift or Curse: The Book of the Four Souls  
  
Tamahome stood aghast. Had she just said the she blamed him for what happened?  
  
"Miaka?" he asked, taking a step towards her.  
  
"No! Don't come near me! I hate you Tamahome! If I had never opened this stupid book, none of this would have happened!"  
  
Pain; searing pain. It felt as though a knife had been driven through his heart.  
  
"You are the reason that Yui-chan hates me! I was with you when she needed me most! She had to go through so many horrible things because I wasn't there to save her!" she cried, tears streaming down her face.  
  
"Miaka, what are you saying?" he asked.  
  
"I never want to see you again! I hate you!" she shouted, turning on her heel.  
  
"But, wo ai ni! Do you hear me? I said I love you!" Tamahome cried, grabbing her hand.  
  
SMACK! Tamahome now bore a second mark on his face.  
  
"Don't touch me! Your words mean nothing! NOTHING!"  
  
Miaka began to walk away, sobbing. Suddenly, she broke into a run.  
  
"I'M COMING YUI-CHAN! HOLD ON!" she called.  
  
  
  
Tamahome lie on the floor, watching Miaka disappear from sight. He watched as the love of his life vanished from his world. Tears streamed from his eyes, running onto the cold floor.  
  
His heart ached, all he felt was despair. Fleeting visions of Miaka passed through his mind, only memories. These were all illusions, not the real Miaka. The real Miaka had just stormed out of his life, leaving him alone in the world.  
  
How could she do this, he questioned. How could she be so cold?  
  
Tamahome passed out of consciousness.  
  
  
  
This is how Nuriko later found him; a crumbled heap on the floor. She knew nothing of what had happened, though she assumed it wasn't a good sign.  
  
Only after shaking him rigorously, did he stir. He slowly came to and being surprised to see Nuriko hovering over him, yelled.  
  
"You don't have to be that surprised to see me," she said, backing away. "I can't possibly look that dreadful."  
  
"I'm sorry, it's just, I wasn't expecting to see you there," he replied, sitting up.  
  
"Who were you expecting to see?" she asked, taking a seat.  
  
"No one," he replied quickly.  
  
"Where's Miaka? I was sure she was with you."  
  
"She was, until she said she hate me."  
  
"Hate you? Are you sure you weren't dreaming? Miaka is head over heels for you," Nuriko replied, looking thoughtful.  
  
"No, I was definitely awake when she said that," he said.  
  
"That's strange," Nuriko said abruptly.  
  
"What? That Miaka blames me for her and Yui no longer being friends?"  
  
"No," Nuriko said, searching through her kimono. "I was sure I had a mirror in here."  
  
"What on earth does that have to do with what I was just saying?!" he shouted.  
  
"Oh, nothing. It's just that there is a mark on you're face, I thought you might want to see."  
  
"Huh?" he asked. "You know that symbol has always been on my forehead, Nuriko."  
  
"Not that one, Tama-kins. There's another one," she replied, handing him a small mirror.  
  
She was right, on Tamahome's left cheek, a red handprint could still be seen!  
  
Chapter note: I know that in these chapters I refer to Nuriko as a 'she'. I know the whole story about how this man became a cross-dresser and such, but for simplicity, I will call him a woman (which he can pass off rather well). Hopefully, no objections. Well, if so, feel free to express them, or better yet, bring them up with the creator of Fushigi Yugi! Thanks for reading!  
  
Kawaii Youko ^_^ 


	3. Yui's Betrayal and Miaka's Regret

Yui's Betrayal and Miaka's Regret  
  
Miaka continued to run until she could no longer. She felt exhausted, having just escaped from the palace. She willed her feet to move, but they didn't seem to want to budge. It felt as though blocks of stone had been tied to them.  
  
Still, Miaka trudged on, walking along a path in the woods. It was getting dark out, and Miaka had no clue where she was to go now.  
  
She had just left behind her life, her friends, but most of all, she had left behind Tamahome.  
  
She fell to her knees, sobbing wildly.  
  
"What have I done?" she cried into the night.  
  
There was a rustling in the bushes to Miaka's right. She looked at it, her eyes wide with fear. She heard the crunching of leaves and quickly shut her eyes.  
  
"Don't kill me!" she shouted, covering her face.  
  
The sound of footsteps reached Miaka's ears. She feared a bandit had come to rob her. As she sat, trembling with fear, she heard a voice she recognized as Yui-chan's.  
  
"Why would I do that?" Yui-chan asked.  
  
Miaka looked up in shock. She could hardly believe her eyes. There stood Yui-chan, actually speaking to her!  
  
"Yui-chan?" she asked vaguely.  
  
"Who else were you expecting?" she asked mildly, placing her hands on her hips.  
  
Tears filled Miaka's eyes, and began to stream down her face.  
  
"I'm so sorry Yui!" she cried, throwing herself at Yui's feet. "I know what you went through! I know Yui!"  
  
"Get up off of the ground," Yui said coldly, taking a step back.  
  
Reluctantly, Miaka rose to her feet, still sobbing.  
  
"Yui-chan, I know what happened to you, and I'm sorry you had to go through that," Miaka said quietly.  
  
Yui smirked. "So, you think you know what I've been through, do you?" she asked in a derisive tone. "You think you know the misery I went through, all because you weren't there?"  
  
To Miaka's surprise, tears filled Yui's eyes.  
  
"While you were out there doing who knows what with Tamahome, I was there, screaming for help! I was waiting for you! And you never came!"  
  
"Yui-chan," Miaka began, crying harder than ever, "if I had known - "  
  
"You mean if you'd have cared!" Yui shouted at her. "You only care about yourself!"  
  
"Yui, don't say that! I left Tamahome to come and find you!" Miaka cried, her heart felt as if it was being wrenched from her chest.  
  
"What a huge sacrifice! You left Tamahome for a few minutes to check and see if I was still alive! That's really considerate of you!" she shouted at the top of her lungs. Several birds in the trees took flight.  
  
"Yui-chan," Miaka gasped.  
  
"Don't 'Yui-chan' me!" she yelled, clenching her fists. "You left me there to die, just so you wouldn't have to stop kissing Tamahome!"  
  
"I know," Miaka whispered.  
  
"What?" Yui asked.  
  
"I was selfish, I understand that now. Please forgive me."  
  
"Oh, so that's the angle you're playing at," Yui replied cruelly. "You think that if you say you're sorry I'll just forgive you and things can go back to how they were, do you? Well, just in case you hadn't figured this out for yourself, sorry doesn't cut it."  
  
Miaka looked into Yui's eyes. They seemed to glow red, as though of fire burned within. No tears could be seen now, only the fires of hatred.  
  
"Yui, this isn't like you, not at all," Miaka said.  
  
"You're right, it's not like me," she said, crossing her arms. "The old me would have believed your fake sympathy and forgave you. Then, only suffer again by having you stab me in the back once more! No, never again will that happen."  
  
"I would never stab you in the back!"  
  
"How can I believe you when you knew I loved Tamahome too?!" Yui cried.  
  
"Is this what it all comes down to Yui?"  
  
"Is what all it comes down to?" she sneered. "I know you love Tamahome, but so do I."  
  
"You don't deserve him! You would just hurt him, just like you did to me!"  
  
Miaka took a step towards her. Yui, in turn, took a step back.  
  
"Don't come near me," she told her frigidly. "And if you're smart, you'll stay away from Tamahome too."  
  
With those last words, Yui turned on her heel and walked away, leaving Miaka alone once again.  
  
I suppose you could more or less have expected that from Yui; since throughout the series she has several arguments like this with Miaka. What could happen next to our poor Suzaku no Miko?  
  
Kawaii Youko ^_~ 


	4. The Crossroads

Disclaimer: I still don't own Fushigi Yuugi or anything else. I was just re- stating that for you.  
  
The Cross-roads:  
  
Miaka crumbled, both mentally and physically. As of now, she had lost everything here that meant anything to her. She had run out on Tamahome, and Yui, well, she had just royally blown her off, so what was she to do now?  
  
'Could I go back?' she asked herself.  
  
She could go back now and apologize to him, beg him to take her back, but would he? After having his heart torn in two, could he just forgive and forget? No, of course not. Tamahome was gone now.  
  
Miaka was at the cross-roads. Down one path stood Tamahome, his arms thrown wide open, ready to take her back. Down the other, stood Yui-chan, holding up a test form; she and Miaka had made it into high school together. They both were calling her name, trying to get her to come to them.  
  
She stood there, at the fork. Part of her told her to go one way, but the other said the opposite. She felt as though she were tearing at the seams. She couldn't have both, she realized that, but how could she choose between the two things so precious to her? Her mind was screaming out orders; telling her what to do.  
  
'Friends are forever! Tamahome isn't even real! He's a fictional character!' her brain shouted, trying to jolt her to the harsh reality that Yui was the only real person there, the only one who could go home with her and remain forever.  
  
However, her heart was screaming the contrary. 'Tamahome loves you! You two belong together! Yui has made up her mind! Do what feels right!'  
  
Miaka clutched her head, feeling faint. How could such a decision be placed on her young shoulders? If given this scenario, most adults would feign to the middle road, neither.  
  
She blinked. Was that even an option? Could she exist without either rather than choose and be forever torn? No, she couldn't do that either. There was seemingly no way out of this dilemma.  
  
Miaka held her hands over her face. She couldn't decide; she couldn't leave one alone to forge through the world on their own. That much she knew she couldn't do.  
  
  
  
"Yui!" Miaka felt her throat rasp out. It was strangely harsh and echoed in the still silence of her dreams.  
  
She heard the magnified sound of glass breaking and looked down. There, on the ground, was a shattered picture frame. The picture within was old and fading away. Inside the shattered and tarnished frame was a photograph of her and Yui, each about five years old, holding up necklaces they had made in school. The longer Miaka stared at the photo, the more it changed.  
  
Yui's face metamorphosed into a blurred spot on the photo, fading from view, while Miaka's stayed as clear as ever. The expression on Miaka's photographed face changed as well. It seemed to soften as though it were alive, instead of captured on film and paper.  
  
Soon, Yui's face had completely disappeared from the photograph and Miaka's was still in plain view. Slowly, it seemed that another face was taking shape in the empty space next to her. The hair was much darker, the face more tan, the smile the same; Tamahome.  
  
Miaka just watched as the lines became clearer; it was Tamahome who now stood alongside her. He was beaming as he stared back at the now teary eyed Miaka.  
  
"T-Tamahome?"  
  
  
  
It's been forever since I've updated this story, so let me apologize now. I've been busy and bored, but I finally wrote it! Sorry again!  
  
Well, this chappie was beyond weird. I don't know where it came from, nor do I honestly care to explore what goes on in my mind. ^^  
  
Let me know whatcha think!  
  
Kawaii Youko ^_~ 


	5. Bittersweet Dreams

Disclaimer: I do not own Fushigi Yuugi, and quite personally I don't plan to either. ^-^;; Of course, if that EVER changes, and it won't, you people will be the first to know.  
  
Bitter-sweet Dreams:  
  
Miaka continued gazing at the picture, never shifting from it. Pearly tears began welling up in her eyes, obscuring her vision. Without so much as a second thought to her actions, she hugged the shattered picture frame to her chest, the pieces of glass clinging to her tan school uniform. Several small shards tumbled into her lap as she shook with silent sobs.  
  
"T-Tamahome, Yui-chan," she muttered, clenching her eyes tight in mental anguish. "What have I d-done?!"  
  
She shifted the picture frame, hugging it ever closer to her body. She could feel pieces of the transparent glass digging into her palms as she gripped it tightly. From her eyes fell a number of silvery tears, landing with a soft pitter-patter sound on the floor.  
  
"I can't choose! I just can't!" she cried out.  
  
Sorrow filling her already occupied heart, she cast the picture frame away from her body, hearing it collide with the solid ground. Scattered around her were the remnants of glass, glittering in an almost hypnotic light. Miaka blinked.  
  
'There IS a way I won't have to chose,' she reminded herself.  
  
Miaka extended her already scraped hand to the floor, retrieving a particularly jagged portion of glass. Her eyes focused on it, studying every inch of the surface. Hesitating slightly, she ran her finger over the serrated edge, testing it. She felt it cut the tip of her forefinger, a small stream of blood trickling from the wound. It ran slowly down her finger, condensing into a small drop, and falling to the floor.  
  
Biting her lower lip the downtrodden girl took the glass sliver, holding it between her hands as though it were a small, iron dagger. She took several deep breaths, feeling her heart rate quicken. Blood was pounding in her ears as she raised the piece of glass.  
  
'It's now or never,' she told herself in her mind.  
  
"This is for both of you!" Miaka shouted, plunging the dagger deep into her rib cage.  
  
  
  
The brunette's eyes shot open as quickly as a bullet discharges from the barrel of a gun. Her breathing was rapid and laboured, her mouth tasted of dirt. Beads of sweat embroidered her forehead, several pieces of auburn hair pasted to her wan face. A feeling of numbness had consumed her body; a dull, throbbing sensation.  
  
Using a bit of effort, Miaka managed to get to her knees, her breathing returning to normal. Her hands groped about her stomach, feeling for any sign of the stabbing wound, to no avail. There was no blood; and there was no wound.  
  
"It - It was all a dream," she said aloud. "But I-I was sure I'd died. I had f-felt the pain! I killed myself!"  
  
"Actually, Miaka, you were only dreaming," answered an upbeat voice; Chichiri's. The blue haired seishi hovered in mid-air, his staff clutched in one hand, his usual smile on his face.  
  
The girl looked up at him in surprise. "Ch-Chichiri? Is that really you?"  
  
"Of course it's me. No da!" he replied, smiling a bit more. "Who did you think it was?"  
  
"I'm not sure," Miaka answered meekly, her hand going to her temple. She blinked, and looked back at him. "Wait, how did you know what I was dreaming? Were you spying on my dream?!"  
  
Chichiri, hearing the sharp tone in her voice, held up his hands. "No, of course not."  
  
"Then how did you know I had tried to kill myself in my dream?" she asked, her hands going to her hips instinctively.  
  
"Well," the aqua haired man began, scratching the side of his head. "You see, while you were dreaming, you were yelling things, most of them incoherent. I happened to be walking along the path, recognized your voice, assumed you could be in trouble, and when I arrived here, I concluded that you must be dreaming about suicide. No da!"  
  
A sweatdrop rolled down the side of Miaka's head. "You concluded all of THAT from what I was saying?!"  
  
"Well, my other hunch was from the fact that you were making stabbing motions at your stomach in your sleep," he replied, never letting his smile fade. "There wasn't much else you could have been doing."  
  
The teenage girl sighed. "I see."  
  
"Tamahome really misses you," Chichiri said thoughtfully, changing the subject. "He's been a real mess ever since you left. He just sits and stares at the wall, hardly willing to do anything."  
  
Miaka felt tears well up in her eyes as she heard Tamahome's name. "He d- does?"  
  
With a sympathetic smile Chichiri nodded. "Very much so. You're all he ever talks about. Miaka this, Miaka that. Why'd you leave him?"  
  
"I-I didn't exactly leave him; I just left."  
  
"Wouldn't that be leaving him?" the cheerful man questioned. "Or be the same basic thing? No da!"  
  
Miaka's lip trembled slightly. She willed her tears to stay hidden from Chichiri; willing herself to disguise her lonesome state of mind. "N-n-no."  
  
"Then why don't you come back to the palace? Back to us? Miaka?"  
  
The brown-clad school girl had clasped her hands over her ears, gritting her teeth and clenching her eyes shut. A number of small, shimmering tears streaked her cheeks.  
  
"I can't come back! That would mean I'd be choosing Tamahome over Yui! She'd never forgive me!" Miaka cried in anguish.  
  
Chichiri sighed, clasping his hand gently over the girl's shoulder. He carefully pried her hands from over her ears. "Listen to me, Miaka," he explained, his voice uncharacteristically serious. "Not talking to Tamahome; or any of us won't make what happened between you and Yui go away. The best thing you can do is to come back, and we can all find a way to make things right again."  
  
With a weak smile on her face, Miaka nodded, wiping the tears from her eyes. "Right."  
  
"Besides," Chichiri continued, "you must be getting pretty hungry by now. Dinner is being served at the palace right now in fact! Lots of good food, no da!"  
  
"F-food?" the Miko asked, clasping her hands together, a small stream of drool trickling down her chin. "Lead me to it! I'm STARVING! And after that, we can have cake! And then candy and cookies and rice pudding!"  
  
Miaka, eyes shining with excitement, dashed off, a cloud of dust trailing behind her.  
  
Chichiri sweatdropped. "I guess some things never change. HEY MIAKA! WAIT UP! NO DA!"  
  
  
  
I'm sorry, it's been MONTHS since I've updated this fic. I've been busy with other things *cough* and I am just now catching up on posting new chapters. Hope you enjoyed this! Next chapter is sure to be full of reunions and interesting stuffs! Or at least I think so. ^-^;;  
  
Until next time, ja ne!  
  
Kawaii Youko ^_~ 


	6. Delusional

Disclaimer: I don't own Fushigi Yuugi, Miaka, Tamahome, Yui, Chichiri, Nuriko, Hotohori, Tasuki, or any of the other characters.

Author's Note: I'm just now coming to the realization that it's been about nine months since I last updated this story! I'm terribly sorry! I've been so wrapped up, mostly writing other stories, or working on other various things. I apologize.

Enjoy the **extremely** delayed update!

Delusional:

"Did _anyone_ catch that last one?"

Never in any of their of their lives had they seen someone eating at such an astounding rate, nor had it been thought possible that hands could snatch morsels so quickly, chew and swallow them in what seemed the blink of an eye. However, as they watched Miaka shovel food into her mouth, attempting to recall details of what had happened back in the woods.

Out of Miaka's overfull mouth came a stream of incoherent words, her cheeks bulging with food, giving her face the appearance of a chip-munk.

"You lost a bull?"

"Your head got caught between the legs of a stool? What kind of idiotic woman are yeh?" Tasuki asked, dumbfounded.

Shaking her head vigorously, Miaka swallowed the massive quantity of food jammed inside her mouth.

"No," she replied, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. "I said it was terrible, and it was!"

"Why did you leave, Miaka?" came Hotohori's placid voice, as he brushed several long strands of olive hair out of his eyes.

"I.. I had to get away."

"To find Yui?"

"No," Miaka whispered, shaking her head from side to side. "Not so much to find Yui, just to get away."

"We were worried sick about you," Nuriko told her calmly, a hand coming to rest on her shoulder.

"All of us were," the Emperor added, with a small nod.

Miaka cast her eyes downward, her hands coming to rest atop her dirtied skirt. She spoke softly, not daring to look any of them in the eyes.

"I'm sorry you guys; I didn't mean to cause so much trouble."

"And poor Tamahome's been a wreck.."

_Tamahome._

'_Do you feel that? That is my heart beating away..'_

'_Tamahome..'_

_Beneath her quivering hand, Miaka could feel Tamahome's heart thumping inside the walls of his rib cage. The beating had grown steadily faster, and the symbol on his forehead was now glowing a vivid red. All at once she could feel herself falling into Tamahome's spell; his teal eyes were staring back into hers. His head was now tilted to the right, his lips merely inches from her own.._

'_Tamahome, I - can't.'_

_She couldn't kiss him; not if it meant betraying Yui again. She couldn't continue being with Tamahome if she knew it was the one factor driving a stake through hers and Yui's friendship. She could not go on loving him._

"Tamahome.."

".. and that's how I found him, lying on the floor, unconscious," Nuriko finished thoughtfully.

"Women, feh," scoffed Tasuki, crossing his arms tightly in front of his chest. "Not worth the trouble."

"Watch it, fan-boy. You're in the presence of two devastatingly beautiful women, and neither of us are afraid to apply force."

"I see one woman, and I see one Nuriko. I'd hardly call the pair of yeh 'devastatingly beautiful'."

There was a flash of purple hair, and in one flourishing motion, Tasuki's back collided with the hard floor, a loud groan escaping. Poise regained, Nuriko brushed her hands off on her pants.

"That'll teach him."

After a chorus of agreement from the remainder of the warriors, Nuriko's attention returned to the now sobbing Miaka. Gripping her shoulders firmly, the brunette rocked back in forth on the floor.

"Don't cry Miaka," Nuriko cooed, giving her a gentle embrace. "Tasuki didn't mean all of those things. You're beautiful too."

With those words, Hotohori rubbed his temple in frustration.

"Somehow, I don't think Tasuki's unfounded remarks are the reason for her tears."

_Tamahome.._

"I believe," he continued slowly, "that Miaka needs to speak with someone else right now. Perhaps it would be best if we gave her some time to talk things over with Tamahome, and let her explain everything to us in due time."

"Right," the others replied, nodding in agreement.

Reluctantly, Nuriko let loose the shaking girl, getting to her feet. Shuffling along with the others, she strained her ears to hear the last bit of conversation with His Majesty.

"Everything will be all right," Hotohori reassured her, wiping a tear from her cheek. "I'll send someone to fetch Tamahome for you."

"T-thank you," Miaka muttered, giving him a feeble smile as he rose to his feet.

"You're welcome."

_Let him forgive me, please._

For several minutes, Miaka sat alone on the cold floor, her arms drawn close to her chest. Facing away from the large pair of doors, she prayed silently for Tamahome's forgiveness. And, after what seemed like hours, the door slowly creaked open.

"Miaka?"

Her heart skipped a beat. "I-I'm here."

As Tamahome approached her from behind, all Miaka perceived was the tapping of his shoes against the floor.

_Please don't hate me, Tamahome._

"Is it really you?" the man asked, as he walked around the sitting girl, and stood directly

in front of her.

"Yes," she answered quietly, not daring to look up at him.

Without so much as an utterance of warning, the dark-haired boy fell to his knees before her. He bowed his head to her, and clasped his hands together. Surprised, Miaka glanced up, her eyes meeting his.

"Tamahome.."

Before she was able to utter another syllable, Tamahome held up a hand.

"Say nothing more," he told her, staring intently into her hazel-coloured eyes. Cautiously, he moved closer to her, his arms wrapping themselves about her shoulders. "Don't apologize. Just allow me to hold you, Miaka, this one, last time."

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Chapter Note: This story isn't over just yet! I still have some more writing to do -- and Miaka still hasn't chosen who she values more dearly: Tamahome, or Yui. Thank you for reading chapter six of "Can You Feel My Heart Beating Away"!

And if you will, before clicking off this story, leave me a nice, long review. Then maybe, _just maybe_, I'll be motivated to write the next chapter really soon!

Fushigi Yuugi © Yuu Watase

"Can You Feel My Heart Beating Away" © Kawaii Youko


	7. Sweet Discourses

Disclaimer: I don't own Fushigi Yuugi, China, Miaka, Tamahome, Yui, Nakago, Nuriko, Tasuki, Chichiri, Soi, Suzaku, or anything else in this fic.

Author's Note: Inspiration! Yes! It's come back to me!

I'd like to thank Lady Lunara for leaving reviews on this fic! She's so awesome! (And she's a good writer too! Check out her stuff!) Also, I'd like to thank Minako-hime for writing me such a great, long review!

Without further ado, read the next chapter of "Can You Feel My Heart Beating Away", and leave me a nice review when you're done!

Sweet Discourses:

_One, last time?_

"Tamahome?"

With his shoulders slumped, Tamahome relaxed his embrace, gazing into Miaka's eyes. Lining the pair of somber eyes, were several large, pearly tears.

"What did you mean by that?" the girl asked, gingerly using her hand to tuck a few of his longer bangs behind his ear.

"Mean by w-what, Priestess?"

"What did you mean by 'this one, last time'?"

There was a dead silence, as Tamahome cast his glance to the floor, his hold on Miaka releasing all together.

_Please, speak to me. _

Still, there was only silence.

_Tamahome, please!_

"I meant exactly what I said," he answered finally, closing his eyes. "I meant that I hoped you would permit me to hold you, just once more."

"I don't understand."

'_No! Don't come near me! I hate you Tamahome! If I had never opened this stupid book, none of this would have happened!'_

_The memories._

'_You are the reason that Yui-chan hates me! I was with you when she needed me most! She had to go through so many horrible things because I wasn't there to save her!'_

'_Miaka, what are you saying?'_

'_I never want to see you again! I hate you!'_

It was all returning to her; the pain, the screaming, and the look in Tamahome's eyes. She remembered everything about that night, suddenly, as the memories of her departure flooded back into her mind.

"No.." the school-girl said, her voice barely above a whisper. "Wo ai ni."

The dark-haired fighter's eyes shot open, as he quickly glanced at Miaka's face. "W-what did you say?"

"Wo ai ni."

Hardly daring to believe that his ears rang true, he stared, unblinking, into her eyes.

"You taught me that, Tamahome. Wo ai ni; I love you."

"I love you," his voice echoed, shock taking hold of his emotions.

_I do! I do love Tamahome!_

Slowly, almost imperceptibly, Miaka bridged the gap between the two of them, one of her hands resting tentatively on his cheek. Inwardly shaking, she touched her lips to his in a timid kiss, which lasted all of two seconds. Pulling away, slightly embarrassed, Miaka blinked.

"T-Tamahome?" questioned her feeble voice.

"Yes?"

"I've missed you so," she told him, latching onto him with her face buried in his chest.

Returning to reality, Tamahome kissed the top of her head softly, and wrapped his arms snugly around her shoulders.

"And I've missed you," the young man told her, resting his head atop hers and closing his eyes. "More than you'll ever know."

- - -

"Soi, where is Yui?"

Haku Kaen, known as Soi to her fellow warriors, abruptly looked up from a small violet book she had been writing in. There were a number of diagonal smears of black ink on her fingers, as she held the calligraphy-style pen between two nimble fingers. Glancing at Nakago briefly, she returned her gaze to the pages.

"How should I know?" Soi asked curtly. "And why would I _care_? The brat's probably hiding in her room, whining about _something_."

Contorting her face into a shrewd impersonation of Yui's, and imitating the Priestess' voice, Soi sniffled pitifully. "No body likes me! They all wish I was dead! Tamahome doesn't love me, and Miaka _stole_ him from me! Oh, boo hoo!"

Nakago cast a look of admonition upon the woman, shaking his head. "But Miaka _did_ steal him. And thus, she should be duly punished."

"I honestly don't see why you waste your time with that deplorable creature. All day long, it's 'Yui needs this' or 'the Priestess wants that'," Soi grumbled boorishly. "I'm getting sick of it, Nakago. How long are we going to go on babysitting that selfish little wench?"

Striding limberly towards Kaen, the crude warrior gripped the woman's shoulder tensely. "As long as it takes," he stated resolutely. "Do you understand that?"

Taken aback ever so slightly, Soi nodded, muttering a few words of agreement.

"Good. There'll be no more discussion about it; you will endure and tend to Yui's every need or whim."

"Right."

Nakago, feeling that his business was finished, released her shoulder and turned sharply on his heel. Setting a brisk pace, he began towards the massive wooden doors. Even then, having just been ordered around and reprimanded, Soi's eyes followed him intently. She observed the way his hair swung from side to side, as though polishing his already gleaming armor. Soi watched languorously his shapely calves flexing and relaxing with each calculated stride.

Bestowing a parting glance on the man's back, Soi's hand came to rest timidly upon the shoulder Nakago had seized. Despite the dull ache in the limb, the woman smiled, and returned to her writing.

_If only Nakago knew. _

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Chapter Note: Yes! I finally finished the chapter!

Well, what did you guys think? I know it's a tad short, again, but I'm planning for the next chapter to be longer. It's getting pretty close to the end, I do believe.

Now, if you'll just click the 'Submit Review' button, and leave me some feedback, I'll start writing the next chapter!

Fushigi Yuugi © Yuu Watase

"Can You Feel My Heart Beating Away" © Kawaii Youko


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